Hate

I hate holidays.  I hate screaming.  I hate mucus.  I hate liars.  I hate body odor.  I hate being lonely.  I hate crying.  I hate headaches.  I hate fighting.  I hate meeting people.  I hate bright lights when I'm trying to sleep.  I hate the price of fuel.  I hate vinegar.  I hate that my mail was wet yesterday.  I hate that I'm not a good friend to most people.  I hate ants.  I hate dirty floors.  I hate that my dogs piss on my stairs.  I hate that I don't have a door to my downstairs bathroom.  I hate blowing snot bubbles.

~Nancy Drew

Sometimes

Sometimes I have no words.  Sometimes I make stupid decisions.  Sometimes I make smart decisions.  Sometimes I have money.  Sometimes I have energy.  Sometimes I have nightmares.  Sometimes I feel love.  Sometimes I hate people.  Sometimes I cry.  Sometimes I sleep.  Sometimes I sneeze.  Sometimes I crave affection.  Sometimes I laugh.  Sometimes I ramble.  Sometimes I forget for a split second just how lonely I really am. 

~Nancy Drew

My Lucy Goosey

I've missed blogging for the past couple days.  Between my nightmares and Lucy getting hurt, I just haven't made time.  

McLovin was picking on Lucy after the first egg.  After the second egg, he basically mauled her.  They are in separate cages and Lucy is bleeding everywhere.  Her foot is covered in blood and is swollen.  She keeps shaking it like it's hurting.  I know it is, but I don't know how to help her.  It's not like the pet store sells cockatiel tylenol.  It's been a couple days and I'm sure it will take some time for her to heal.  I'm hoping that she survives.

My hopes for having baby cockatiels are out the window.  No babies since one parent is hurt and one is away from the eggs. 

~Nancy Drew

Alarms

I had HORRIBLE, HORRIBLE, HORRIBLE dreams last night.  I woke up afraid to go back to sleep.  I'm really sick of these dreams.  I wish I had a switch to stop myself from dreaming at all.

I had a security system installed in my house today.  I'm quite happy about it.  Maybe I'll sleep better at night.  It cracked me up when the dudes came to my door and asked if I have an alarm system.  I said that I have a Steve.  They asked to see him so I pulled Steve out the front door.  The men seemed to jump back quite a bit.  Just try to break into my house, bitches.

Bonus for the week:  I dropped another pants size.  WINNING!

And just because she's cute... here is a pic of Brittanney with Steve.

~Nancy Drew

I made a Gay Discovery

Today I had an incredible discovery.  Incredible, yes.... but only because I knew it all along.

Brittanney and I had a talk this evening and I started to cry.  Everything fell into place and I got slapped with the realization that I've never really been straight or bisexual.  I've always been gay and I've been lying to myself for years.  All of the relationships that I've had in the past felt like there was something missing.  That wasn't only because I was with the wrong person for me, it was because I was with a male.  

I remember being attracted to women at a young age and having a t.v. crush on a girl while I was in high school.  The last two relationships I've had with men were lies.  Yes, they made me happy because we were friends, but something was definitely missing.  I tried talking to Neil about this several months before we broke up.  In the end, I decided that I wanted to date a girl more than I wanted to be with Neil so, I broke up with him.  I miss him because he was my best friend and an amazing person, but I know I made the right decision.  I would never be completely in love if I had stayed.  It wasn't fair to him and it wasn't fair to me.   

So, here I am.  Gay, Lesbian, Non-breeder, and honest.  I'm finally honest with myself.  Look out, ladies.  No homo.

Yay for gay.  I love rainbows.

~Nancy Drew

Babies!

I am just thrilled! 

I know that I've bitched and complained on my blog for quite a while but most people who see me in person wouldn't real know that I've been depressed.  I act like things are okay.  But today, I will not complain on my blog...because we have an egg!

Lucy squirted out an egg and right now, McLovin is sitting on it.  I cannot wait to see if it develops or if Lucy lays more eggs.  Our little cockatiel factory is working overtime.  They have been having some serious bird sexy time and it looks like it's paying off.

I walked into the office because I thought the dogs were pestering the birds.  I looked in the cage and I could only see Lucy.  I looked into the nesting box and couldn't see McLovin, so I went into mini-panic and opened the cage and started to pull the box closer so I could open the top to look inside.  The instant my hand touched the box, McLovin popped his head out the door of the box and hissed and snapped at me.  I've never been happier to have a damn bird try to eat my ass.

Anyone want to take bets on how many eggs she will lay?  I bet 4.

~Nancy Drew

Julia/Dance/Zumba

Julia is at it again... This time she added in a tad bit of Zumba dance... She needs to broadcast this shit on ustream.  I would die happy if I could watch this everyday... or at least die from laughing.  

Click here to read Julia's blog

I love that girl.

~Nancy Drew